An unashamed Eurovision fan I may be, but my enthusiasm for ESC 2009 has so far been limited. From the bits and bobs I watched of the BBC's voting show, Your Country Needs You, the choice was Jade Ewen or gubbins. Jade can certainly sing, in that Sylvia Young Theatre School way. She once had a bit-part in Casualty once, which is like taking a GCSE in acting.
However, Andrew Lloyd Webber's song sounds like a leftover from a West End show that closed early. It's all vaguely uplifting, and has more syrup than Tate and Lyle. Sample lyric: 'it's my time, my moment, I'm not gonna let go of it'. Excuse me, but I thought this was about the United Kingdom and not one stage school graduate in a sparkly dress. Here are some people who could have written a better song:
1) Morrissey. It's been a few years since Mozzer said he would but then didn't. My fingers remain crossed that he'll change his mind.
2) Jarvis Cocker. Jarv said he'd write a song if asked. I say he should have written a speculative song then we could have voted for it against Sir Andrew's offering.
3) Morrissey AND Jarvis Cocker. How potentially amazing? Very potentially amazing, indeed.
4) Kid Carpet. The Bristol pop-twiddler declared that winning Eurovision was his ultimate ambition, and if that's not throwing your hat into the metaphorical ring then I don't know what is. Some of the songs on his recent album Casio Royale are rather good, you know. Especially Hitting The Wall.
5) Little Boots. I know you agree.
6) Me. I'm sure I could throw something together. It would probably involve a Casio VL-Tone, kazoo and lots of cowbell.
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